Something Secret
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“We dance round in a ring and suppose, While the secret sits in the middle and knows.” – Robert Frost
I have a secret. Not big. Not little either. Somewhere in between.
I’m not sure I should even call it a secret. Because that makes it seem a bit dramatic. It’s just a thing I can’t tell you. Yet.
What is a secret? Is it something we can’t tell or choose not to? Is it something we keep by choice or by compulsion?
What is a secret? Is it something that suffocates its owner and intrigues all others? Is it something that lurks under the surface of spoken truth? Is it something that we choose to have or a possession borne from circumstance? Is it something that burrows deep and bubbles up, threatening the peace? Is it something that gets in the way or something that clears the way?
Can life be lived without secrets or are secrets part and parcel of humanity, of existence? Are secrets contagious? Do secrets die if left alone? Is a secret told no longer a secret? Does a secret never told grow bigger?
Can we keep secrets from ourselves? From each other? From the world? What would the world be without secrets? Pure? Boring? Unrecognizable?
I have a secret. Not big. Not little. Somewhere in between.
I can’t wait to tell you. But I will.
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What is a secret? Do you have one? Or many? How have secrets affected your life?
Everyone struggles and...
I hate secrets. And surprises. They make me crazy, so I try not to keep any. When a friend says, “I have a secret,” I spend the next several minutes (okay, hours or even days) wondering what it could be. And my guesses are NEVER right!
A good portion of my life is spent conducting secret proceedings (grand jury investigations/presentations). I deplore secrecy for secrecy’s sake but since it is a felony if I reveal things relating to the Grand Jury, I am incentivized to respect secrecy. am always happy when things are unsealed and become public record. I hate tiptoeing around with my family and friends, I am naturally a collaborative person and I love to run things by people I respect and hear their perspective. Owing perhaps to what I do, I am pretty good at guessing other people’s secrets but I am also discreet about keeping them. (I have some hunches about your secret but I’ll keep them to myself…)
You certainly know how to pique a girl’s curiosity! I gather it’s a good secret, so I will wait patiently for the rest of the story.
As for whether it is something that gets in the way, clears the way, or paves the way – I think that depends on the secret itself, and the secret keeper. Those who are condfident are probably less bothered by keeping secrets. Those who are not are probably more burdened by them just due to affiliative needs. I fall somewhere in the middle.
I too have a few hunches about your secret. But D was so calm, cool, and collected about hers that I feel compelled to match her maturity. (Way to ruin my fun, D!
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Sissela Bok’s book “Secrets” might interest you. (I think she wrote it as a sequel to “Lying”.) She’s a fantastic philosopher/ethicist with an interesting family background of her own being the daughter of Gunnar Myrdal and the wife of former Harvard President, Derek Bok. A good writer too!
I do believe that a secret told is no longer a secret.
And yet, even with that I have a few secrets I have at least 2 of my own.