Make Every Man Want You
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Did this title hook you in? Fabulous. That was the intention.
But it’s not my title. So I can’t take credit. This is the title of Marie Forleo’s bestselling book. The subtitle for said book? How to Be So Irresistible You’ll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself!
Committed or no (Marie assures me that the title of her book is a bit of a Trojan Horse that belies the deeper, more universal substance of its pages) how can you not be the least bit curious about the contents of this book? I am. Check out the first paragraph of Marie’s Preface: “What if I told you, that in about an hour, I could share information with you that could make you happier, healthier and more attractive in a matter of minutes?”
Um. I’d be listening. We’d all be.
And we will be! For it is time for Happier Hour Part Deux! Many of you know that a month ago I kicked off my quasi-salon-series Happier Hours and that I hosted the incomparable Gretchen Rubin who spoke and sparked conversations on the topic of Happiness. We all know that I suffered a sublime Happiness Hangover after that exquisite evening and found myself debating the Dollhouse Hypothesis of well-being. The gist was that the first gathering for wine, women, and words was a ringing success.
Next Wednesday (4/21/10), I will welcome the incomparable “multi-passioned” entrepreneur and author Marie Forleo. Marie’s resume might make you cry. She is a best-selling author, speaker, online-entrepreneur, Nike Athlete and Master Trainer, fitness personality, and dancer/choreographer. Marie’s Rich, Happy & Hot™ brand is “dedicated to empowering women with tools to create financial, spiritual and emotional wealth through entrepreneurship.”
On top of all of this, Marie is a philanthropist, fiancee, and mother. (Nauseous yet?) Marie has appeared in The New York Times, Shape Magazine, on The Rachael Ray Show, ABC’s 20/20, CNN.com, Forbes.com, HSN and has done numerous interviews on radio and TV.
I could go on. But won’t. You get the picture. And it’s very pretty.
I am thrilled to have encountered Marie (thank you, Kate!) and am eagerly anticipating next Wednesday when Marie will grace a wild pack of curious and conscious women with her wisdom and words. Marie will speak on the topic of Presence, on how we can all do a better job of residing in the present moment, and as I am terrible at doing this, I can’t wait to hear what she has to say.
Between now and then, I will do my homework and think about what I want to ask Marie. Some questions I know I want to ask: Ultimately, how effective are self-help books and programs? Has she seen remarkable changes in people who have followed her ideas? Can things like happiness, irresistibility, and presence truly be taught – and learned?
Admittedly, these are tough challenges. But I have zero doubt that Marie will have some insightful answers for me. And all of us.
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- How do you feel about Self-Help books and programs?
- Do you think we can study precepts on how to improve ourselves and truly improve ourselves?
- Do you think that happiness, presence, and irresistibility can be taught – and learned – or do you think these ever-elusive qualities are innate or acquired through life experience?
- Do you have any questions you would like me to ask Marie next week?
**Because this Happier Hour will not take place in my cozy home, we can be a bit more flexible with respect to numbers. If you are reading this now and you are in the Big Apple vicinity and are interested in joining Marie and me for Happier Hour Part Deux next Wednesday (4/21), please email me at ivyleagueinsecurities@gmail.com, introduce yourself, state your interest in attending, and I will send along pertinent event details!**
Honestly, I’ve never found a self-help book to be any benefit. However, I’m always open to new possibilities. Can happiness be taught? I think a person can be taught the steps in achieving happiness (or any of the other other wonderful qualities you mentioned). But to truly understand happiness one must experience it and that can’t be taught.
I would also like to know if Marie has seen remarkable changes in the people who have followed her programs. Thanks!
Hi Erica! Yes. Ideas/principles and practices that support you in being happy can certainly be learned.
Like any skill set or ability (speaking a language; dancing; cooking) happiness and success is a matter of education + action and a HECK of a lot of fun.
Some of us learn from books; some from teachers; some from stories passed down from family and friends, and some from their own direct experience and/or a MASTER mix of all the above.
And on the question about the changes in people who I work with . . . Abso-freaking-lutely
While my work is not for everyone (what is??) for the women who are a good match for my style, we create magic together.
AND I will say that I have received TREMENDOUS benefit from teachers (all kinds of teachers) where there is a really solid philosophy match.
Hope to meet you next week! xo M
Hi Erica;
I just joined Marie’s Rich, Happy and Hot Virtual Mastery program a little over a month ago and can definitely comment on the remarkable changes I’ve seen in my own life just in that short period of time!
I’ve gotten VERY clear on what I want to do in my business and who I want to serve, and am well on my way to being successful and making lots of money with it. I’ve also had a chance to meet and connect with some amazing women through the program and their support, ideas, encouragement and more have been more than worth the price.
Not only that, but I’ve seen how these women are also changing and developing and really rocking it in their businesses – again, just in one short month!
That’s just the perspective of a “newbie” to her programs, and I’m sure she could tell you TONS of stories of gals that she has helped over the last few years.
Jess
Hi Erica,
I’ve been in a couple of Marie’s programs. Yep, she’s the real deal and she rocks. Using principles that Marie has taught me, I’ve managed to save a lot of money and get more things done. The ideas she has exposed me to have helped to shift my view of the world and as a result, I’m happier and great things are happening for me.
Adrienne
Okay, a couple of things to say here. One, women like this absolutely amaze me. I just don’t understand how there are enough hours in a day, days in a week, weeks
in the year to accomplish this much. I can barely find 30 minutes for a quick run or mini yoga session in my day. And even then, something, like brainstorming or preparing healthy meals for my kids, is sacrificed. Also, after having clicked up from your link, I have discovered that this woman is absolutely gorgeous so I can’t imagine there is much difficulty making every man want her. Sure, there is a lot more to it than looks, but it definitely helps.
I am thinking that given her track record she undoubtedly has some wisdom to offer. And I often like the idea of self help books just for the simple fact that by reading them I have already devoted myself to change and growth. However, I’d be cautious to put much stock in something that promises to offer life-changing advice in an hour.
Finally, I have to believe that happiness, presence, and irresistibility can be taught or else there would be no reason for me to continue trying! How sad it would be for me if I thought I could not grow in these areas.
Can’t wait to hear all about Happier Hour Part Deux!
Oh, and the book is preordered. Can’t wait for that as well!
I have to admit that I have had a lot of success in making men want me. I attribute it to the chiseled jaw, green eyes, fabulous sense of humor and tremendous humility.
I am guilty of making fun of self help books and seminars. Many of them seem like scams to me that prey upon the insecurities of people.
There must be some practical knowledge in some of these books and I am sure that the majority of those involved do so with good intentions.
Some of this seems to be common sense to me. Do you know what makes you happy? Can you identify what brings you joy?
If you can answer those questions than you can build map to achieve those things. And you can do all of that without paying anyone for a book or coaching.
At least that is what I think.
HaHa Jack!
I couldn’t resist jumping over here and letting you know you put a huge smile on my face. I am so “happy” of your success to make a lot of men want you!
I agree with the you on the “common sense” part, but so many people get caught up in their own psychobabble that they need someone to lead them into the being present.
Sh*t, just enjoy the journey of doing what you love and being yourself while you do it.
And if you want more than what you have, then go out there and get it. Don’t wait for it to come to you.
At least that’s what the books I’ve read say.
Melody
PS Marie rocks!
Hi Melody,
Happy to be of service. A smile is a valuable commodity. I hear what you are saying about people needing someone to lead them into being present.
My blog is my therapist and best confidant. Doesn’t bitch or nag, never judges.
On a serious note, I am a big proponent of taking time to figure out what makes you happy. I don’t think that a lot of people do it. It sounds simple and obvious, but it is really effective.
And I would add that life experience goes a long way. I used to hate listening to “older people” tell me about how much they had learned. But there is a lot of truth to the benefits of life experience.
Life experience is part of what helps you figure out what makes you happy and what fulfills you. So I don’t negate the need for a guide for some people. I just question that motives and altruism of some of the guides.
Hey Jack!
Absolutely agree on life experience helps you figure things out. And ditto on the benefits of taking the time to look at what it is that actually makes you happy.
I often had ideas of what I THOUGHT would make me happy and had a hard time bridging the gap between what I wanted and what I had.
It was really useful to learn not only how to bridge that gap, but also how to have a damn good time along the way.
On motives: I certainly can’t speak for anyone else, but I’m a passionate learner/teacher/communicator.
This is what I was born to do.
And if my readers, clients and customers are happy as a result of me being a part of their lives via newsletters, blog posts, videos, books, or programs, then I’d say it’s all good
Hi Marie,
I love passion because it is that missing spice that makes life interesting and unique. You seem to have that and I think it is very cool.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a problem with people taking classes or working with mentors to improve themselves. That makes sense to me.
But I am a combination of skeptic and cynic about some of the players and participants. In the end it is not about what I think, I am not here to tell people what to do. Don’t ask my kids about that because they’ll disagree.
I just enjoy the conversation.
Hi Jack,
Yes! I do agree that the motives of others may be for the wrong reasons. I do see the point you are making.
Specifically about Marie. I like Marie. She is authentic, fun, and a hell of a marketer because of it. Lethal combination.
Love this statement, Marie.
“I often had ideas of what I THOUGHT would make me happy and had a hard time bridging the gap between what I wanted and what I had.
It was really useful to learn not only how to bridge that gap, but also how to have a damn good time along the way.”
Authentic makes a huge difference. It is quite powerful and significant.
oh aidan!! i was in new york in february… i am tucked away at my home in oregon now! if only your happier hours had begun one month earlier
i will be waiting, like everyone else, for your most amusing blog the morning after!
I am one of Marie’s gals. I found her last Septemberish and have been hooked since.
She’s for real.
I am a highly sensitive person and have been turned off time and again by the hidden agendas and hidden junk behind a lot of business building programs. I can feel it immediately.
Marie walks her talk.
I am still amazed at the dedication she has to herself and others to be in the present moment and work with what’s there. I have never been this authentically supported in my life.
She is so beautiful BECAUSE of this. She really lets herself be seen, ALL of herself.
Her business strategies hold water and they don’t make me compromise. She has a very holistic view about what you are doing in one place affecting everything else. I have never had this before and I LOVE it. I feel good about everything she offers. No hidden agendas.
Plus, she attracts the MOST incredible crowd of people. I love working with all the ladies in her program and seeing their lives skyrocket.
And, amazing, AMAZING things have come into my life since starting her program: relationships, clients, ideas, programs, letting go of old junk that I had been holding onto for a while, and seeing all that I want right in front of me.
I HIGHLY recommend hearing her speak. I am planning to be there.
Ane
Thank you, Aidan, for putting Marie and her overall message on my radar. This is the amazing thing about social networking, blogging and these incredible platforms that can be created if we are open, supportive and authentic. I have been scrolling through all of Marie’s video messages and seminars and am really impressed and inspired!
I wish I was in NYC next week! What time is the Happier Hour kicking off?
Jocelyn
I first heard of Marie about a year ago. I can definitely say that her energy and vibrancy comes through, and it’s all truthful – honest – spot on.
I can’t speak highly enough of the work she’s put into her Rich, Happy, and Hot programs. I know things shift for me every time I listen to another of her talks and trainings.
So excited for this!
I’ve been working with Marie since January and she is incredible in everyway. Before Marie I was miserable at work, had no clue how I wanted to express myself through my passions of heath/wellness & helping women worldwide and was just basically a victim of my circumstances.
That has all changed!!!
I now look forward to going to work and have changed how I relate to my coworkers, my vision for how I want to make a difference in this world is super clear and I see my world in such a whole new way that I love ever second of my life. I know this may sound a bit exaggerated but it is totally and honestly true!
Marie helped bring awareness to how I was showing up in my own life and how I was supressing my own truth. Now that I am really out there being me and really being honest with myself and those around me life is just grand
Yeah there are things that I want to change but intstead of hatin’ on them and blaming outside circumstances (like i used to) I accept and embrace them which has made things so much more easier and less stressful. It’s an incredible shift and I have been raving to all my peeps about her! I can go on and on but the whole point is that Marie believes in you for who you are and does whatever she needs to to draw your brillance out of you
Can’t wait Aidan. Thanks for setting this up – it sound amazing – and i’ll see you next week!
I’ve never read a self-help book. Personally, I would rather spend that time being out in the world, making my own mistakes and learning from them… an approach which has worked for me so far. On the other hand, I’m interested in hearing about people who’ve found them useful.
I wish I was able to come but alas I’m in LA with my 2 year old!
I’ve been working with Marie for about a month now and I can only echo what the other women in her Rich Happy & Hot Virtual Mastery Program have said already.
Marie is the real deal. Every single time I implement suggestion or tip she shares with me, it gives me results. Simple.
She always honest–even when ya don’t wanna hear it, but she does it in such a supportive way that it’s okay.
I’ve already accomplished more in the last month than I have in the past year. The quality of what I’m doing is better because she teaches how to build a strong foundation…so everything I do in my career and relationships stems from that base.
Have a great talk! I hope that it will be available after the fact for those of us who can’t make it!
So wish I could make the trip down, but it’s a little far
Pre-orderd the book though… (squealing a bit for you!)
I read Marie’s book a few years ago and loved it. I even blogged about it: http://tsquest.blogspot.com/2008/02/communicating-with-men.html
I do love self-help books but I’ve now realized that happiness cannot be taught but it must be practiced! Each belief that we have is a thought that we’ve practiced for years. Worrying seems to be the practice I’ve perfected in my lifetime! Ha! I’m working on building better habits and choosing happiness actively in every moment.
Actually, I read somewhere that neuroscience has proven the brain can be rewired with this “happiness practice”. In my experience, in the past few years, I am definitely a much calmer and happier person than before.
Have fun with Marie! I’m jealous!
I could write a whole blog post on this topic… and think that I probably will thanks to this inspiration. But the short(er) answer is that years ago I was a huge snob about self-help books, and assumed they were all simplistic in philosophy and predatory in nature. Luckily a friend helped me get over that, and some, like Byron Katie’s book ‘The Work’ on the deep end, and Keri Smith’s ‘Living Out Loud’ on the safe, splashy end have changed my life for the better. Maybe not as much as the Brothers Karamozov, but plenty, and in very tangible ways. I think its possible to get things out of self-help if you read/learn with both discernment and an open mind.
Yeah, I gotta echo what others are saying here… Marie is totally, 100% the real deal. I have known her since 2007 through the pages of her book, and have been a friend of hers since 2008 when I first joined one of her programs.
Can someone help you make dramatic changes in your life?
Hell yeah!!
Can that someone be Marie?
Heeaaaalzz yeah!!!!
One reader commented they weren’t sure how much impact a person could have in an hour, and I totally hear what you’re saying, sweet reader- but here’s the thing.
I still remember painting my young son’s tiny table and chairs in my living room while listening to a free one-hour call by Marie (yes, FREE, and only one hour) and, seriously, just about dropping the freaking paintbrush on my carpet as I thought, “Ohmigod… this woman very well may have the secret to life itself!!!!”
Yeah, I’m being a little dramatic
but my point is: Marie’s stuff has an impact for sure! An hour is long enough for sure! When I think of Marie, I think of a woman who really is totally blessed with the gifts of teaching, elucidating, supporting, loving, and more… and is SOOO generously sharing those gifts, it’s just unbelievable.
If you’re anywhere near NYC when she talks, or anywhere near being near to NYC when she talks
, get yourself there!!
it hasn’t even been a week since i joined Marie’s program, and what i have to say is this:
imagine this;
a little over 130 women(&men), from all over the world nurtured big dreams, visions and passions but struggled to bring them to fruition! i mean let’s face it,learning how to get out of our own way to realize the life we deserve isn’t easy. and the reason it isn’t easy is because, despite all the numerous technological devices created to keep us in touch, we are all disconnected and have barricaded ourselves behind a wall of isolation. and then this great beam of light shocks you into the realization that you CAN’T do this alone! NO ONE ever makes it alone. community is essential!
Marie (and her amazing staff) is that beam of light. and what she offers is a safe & supportive community with an energy & magic you just have to see to believe!
we thank you pretty lady!
blue skies,
e
I’m not a fan of “self-help” books. They are too one-line-solution oriented for me to believe they do much good. People who rely on them tend to grab onto whatever catch phrase the book is touting and decide that this is the answer to all their ills, and I find that to be self-defeating. It’s essential, I think, to really deal with problems and issues, deal and work them through. No quick answers or slogans, just serious, hard, sincere work.
Your book, however, looks fabulous!
Like so many of the other posters here, I have found tremendous value in Marie’s teachings.
I was never a follower and only clicked onto her site when someone else that I follow sent out a recommendation for her Rich Happy Hot Virtual Mastery Program. At first, I was skeptical, but I slowly warmed to the concept. Finally, after a month or so of procrastination, I realized I needed some help to get me out of the muck I was stuck in.
I joined only this past Monday and am already getting things done faster, experiencing far greater clarity, and laughing more (the best benefit of all, if you ask me).
Marie’s Live In The Moment attitude coupled with her sense of fun and adventure is absolutely infectious. Not to mention, she rounds out her teachings with some rock solid info. There’s no airy-fairie-trust-in-the-universe-and-all-will-be-well crap here. If you need to get your butt in gear, Marie won’t pull any punches, she’ll tell you straight up!
I love this woman! She has totally rocked my world, and I can never thank her enough.
I was lucky enough to attend her live event in New York City last October, and it truly did change my life. And I am now one of the happy women in her virtual mastery program because I know she will help me get to the next level with where I’m going in my life.
One of the things I love most about Marie is that she tells it like it is, whether you like it or not. She always seems to know what you NEED to hear, not what you think you want to hear. She has a heart bigger than the Big Apple. She’ll call you on your s**t, but she’ll do it with genuine love and caring. She’s able to see the potential in people and guide them in the right direction to achieve it.
Her work is very genuine and real – no woo woo crap. Since the live event in Oct., I have enjoyed each day of my life in ways I never did before. I’ve accomplished more than I ever have, and my life is truly transforming in ways I never dreamed possible.
Yes, she has a raving fan club – but that’s because she’s honest and honestly loves to help people change their lives. It doesn’t get any better than that.
Anyone who has the opportunity to see her should jump at it. Your life will never be the same. I just wish I could be in NYC next week!
I think we can change our lives, dramatically. I think all those things can be taught – happiness, irresistability, presence – because once we’ve confronted the truth of what our life’s been and what it’s meant to be, changes happen.
But no NY lecture for me. I’m in Arizona!
I’m part of Marie’s Rich Happy and Hot Virtual Mastery program 2010, but was introduced to her work with her book “Make Every Man Want You” a couple of years ago.
Marie gets you results. If you do the things she suggests, you will see INSTANT change in interactions with people during your day.
She is not fluff. She is all for doing hard work and working smart to achieve your goals in a shorter amount of time. WHO HAS TIME?? She understands this and can help you implement her tools/coaching into a hectic schedule. That is the power of her work. INSTANT results b/c you can practice her methods of self-improvement with the Starbucks barista, in traffic on the way to work; walking in the park; anywhere. And the bonus?? She teaches you to HAVE FUN while doing it!
I feel fully supported by Marie-I admire her drive to provide the best to her clients- and I fully support her and her work.