Exquisite Exhaustion (a.k.a. I Need a Nap)
- 05
- 27
- 10
I woke up this morning and realized something: I am really really tired. Exhausted.
Exquisitely exhausted.
It’s been a long and lovely week. On Saturday, I headed to New Haven for Sister T’s graduation. Cozy on Yale’s campus, I felt very much at home.
I walked the streets of my past, noting the gorgeous green of the ivy. In the bold May sunshine, I watched my littlest sister graduate.
As we walked from Old Campus, I hung back to get a shot of the graduate. Flanked by sisters. It’s all about sisters.
Oh. Forgot to tell you. During the ceremony, there were a few fun celeb sightings. (I spy Steven Spielberg.)
We made our way to Pierson College. Where four of the five of us Donnelley girls spent our undergrad years. I studied the familiar swirls of a welcoming gate and the beckoning blue of a happy sky.
We posed for pictures. Five daughters. One Mom. The Donnelley girls. Here are our feet.
On Monday, after a whirlwind of commencement activities and a couple of late nights, we came home. On Tuesday, there was a soccer class and a science class and a wonderful luncheon at the Natural History Museum. There was a tearful dedication of a plaque to a certain beloved man of nature. There were construction meetings. There was a panicky and very last-minute trip to Bergdorfs to find the perfect LBD (little book dress). At 8pm, as the store was closing, said dress was purchased.
And yesterday, after an afternoon of signing stacks of Life After Yes at BookExpo America for scores of splendid strangers, I donned my little black dress and indulged in a contemplative moment before my book party. I stopped and said to myself, This is really happening. This is my Now.
We made our way there. To the Library Bar at the Hudson Hotel. A stunning spot with vast portraits of cows and countless books. And perfect peonies from a good and loyal friend.
In the center of the room, there was a beautiful blue pool table. Which kept the boys busy and in good spirits.
Before the guests arrived, my man snapped away. He captured the sublime setting.
He got candids of his wife. Like this one. Note that the only reason I am including this shot is because I kind of like the way my arm looks 
It was meaningful, magical, to be surrounded by so many old books while celebrating a new one.
I like this picture. The juxtaposition of books and cows makes me giggle. It was a night of sweet smiles and friends and family and love and laughter. After the party, I stayed out for a bit with the girls. C, T, and I went for a late night meal. Like old times.
And when I got home, I paused before the mirror in our lobby. I did something strange. Something I have been known to do. I looked at my reflection. I looked at my dress. At my side-swept hair. At my vast smile. And then I took a picture. To have evidence. To memorialize a moment, a fleeting and joyful and hushed moment, with myself.
And then I took a few silly ones. Because in that moment I was feeling good and silly. And I decided there was nothing wrong with that.
And, home again, I slipped out of that black dress and into pajamas and crawled into bed with my snoozing and supportive man. Before nodding off, I kissed the back of his head. And then I slept. And continued to dream.
And I woke up this morning and realized something: I am really really tired. Exhausted.
Exquisitely exhausted.
The truth is I need a nap. And today, instead of racing and chasing and checking my Amazon ranking in ten minute intervals, I am going to take that nap. And if I have my way, there will be a little girl on either side of me cuddled up. And maybe even a cat or two purring at my feet.
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Have you ever experienced exquisite exhaustion? Do you think it is silly (and narcissistic) that I periodically snap pictures of myself? Do you ever do this? Do you need a nap?
Sounds wonderful. Every bit of it. And I think you’ve earned your nap!
Thanks, BLW. It has all been so wonderful and so draining. Amazing and true how those two things can go hand in hand. I tried the nap thing and couldn’t fall asleep. I think I need to relearn how to relax. Any tips?
Loved this. It’s certainly a good kind of exhaustion. Now go get some rest!
By the way, cute black dress.
Thanks, Rudri. As I said to BLW above, I am having a hard time taking it down a notch. Have you ever been so tired that you can’t rest? I remember feeling this way when final exams were over in college…
What a fun post. And I love that in spite of all your accomplishments you still worry about how your arms look in photos. Loved the books and cows, the dress, the hair, and the evening with your sisters. Continued congrats on continued festivities.
Yes, isn’t it amazing that I get to this point and I am still so obsessively concerned with my physical appearance. Viva la shallow end!
Love the pics! You should be exhausted–time for some r&r. I enjoyed the library bar in Prague and was tickled by your pics.
Thanks, Judy. Hoping this coming weekend includes a good bit of R&R. Kicking it off with Sex & the City 2 with friends. Not bad, huh?
I know and love that feeling of exhaustion… the kind that is good and earned and you can allow yourself a day of rest. Certainly YOU deserve it… enjoy! Watch a chick flick! They always give me renewed energy
See above comment. Am slated to see Sex and the City 2 tomorrow. Perfect way to relax and reinvigorate, no?
I loved seeing your photos. I really loved experiencing your excitement and exhaustion.
Great coral earrings and black dress. And I’m so jealous that you could just pop into Bergdorf’s. I used to be able to do that–I miss NYC.
Curious about the book expo? Interesting time for publishers.
I LOVED the picture of the six Donnelly women’s feet. A classic. I know your Dad was with you all.
I think I do take it for granted that I can race out and pop into Bergs on a whim. One of the many many things I adore about life in the big city. I love the shot of our feet too. There is something wonderfully raw and real about the lineup and the sheer number of feet in my family!
If you weren’t exhausted you might have to question whether how you spent your time, At least to me that exhaustion is significant, a reminder of labor and time well spent.
I love that library. It is something that I want for myself, a library such as that.
Jack, I love this idea that exhaustion is evidence of hard work. I think you are right. And I think that is why so many of us are always exhausted – because we are always working hard – at work, at home and in between. We are designing a dark purple library in our new home and I have a hunch it’s going to be my favorite room in the house
Sounds like a wonderful way to reach exhaustion!
Yes, it has been wonderful. And I find the idea of exhaustion as a destination we reach to be really interesting. Maybe there are positive aspects of exhaustion after all and if we were never wiped out, it would be a sign that we are not really living?
I love sisters. I think I’ve told you before, but I’m the fourth of five sisters, too.
When I get the time, I still want to email with you about your book!!! I have been talking it up, because I really did love it. Just passed it off to my sister-in-law who I think will love it. For one, she lives in Manhattan. For two, dated a serious mama’s boy. For three, she enjoys well-written novels.
xo elizabeth
Love that we are fellow members of the five sister species
I would love to chat more about my book and I hope that your SIL loves it!
(PS – How do I convince Husband that we need to have three more girls to achieve the five star magic???)
You are beautiful! Love that dress. Now go an enjoy a well deserved nap.
Thanks, Allison! Must figure out how to nap. It seems I’ve forgotten now. A good first step would be closing the laptop and getting into my comfy bed, huh?
Love the earrings, the dress, the arms
– you looked gorgeous! Glad it was a great night!
Thanks, Jess! I wish you could have been there. Silly old geography
Saw your book today in my wonderful local bookstore (Spirit of ’76 in Marblehead, MA) and did a double-take. Took a picture of it with my iPhone, too, and then promptly left the phone in my husband’s car.
Glad to see you’re basking in it all. Enjoy.
Exquisitely exhausted? I’ve always like the term “existentially tired.” That’s how I’ve felt at the end of a long process that culminates in some sort of accomplishment. Not sure if it fits here, but feel free to steal it if you want.
I hope you got that nap
Just wonderful, lady. I cried. Seriously, cried big fat tears at a few points. So relate-able. I could go on and on and on, but will save it for the book club at Kristen’s!
That dress!!! Gorgeous!!
And I finished Life After Yes last night… loved it! So much more than I thought I would, and I knew I would adore it before I picked it up
aidan, i just love the photos.
i always love your words. ALWAYS.
but seeing you… like really SEEING you is refreshing and fun.
thoroughly enjoyed this one, my friend.
rest well.
Love this pictorial! And the picture of the feet is my favorite. (My daughter takes this shot, every once in a while – at Christmas, at the beach and just today while we were strawberry picking)You’ve more than earned a nap. I say, take a full siesta!
I love the Library Bar. What a perfect place to have a book party. And some wine.
Congrats to you and to your sister! Exhausting, yes, but what an exciting time for both of you
And I love your serious/silly way of capturing it all
I’m late reading this (keeping up these days is a challenge, life is full and happy!), but I’m living vicariously through you (hopefully even the nap part).
Thank you as always for sharing your journey. It makes me smile.