Blahgging
- 09
- 09
- 10
Warning: Honesty and whining ahead. Proceed at your own risk.
Recently, I have been feeling a bit blah about blogging. There. I said it. I don’t really know why. I love this place, this wilderness, this world. I love the fierce flux, the real-time exchange of emotion and idea, the swirl of silly and serious. I love being able to say something each day. I love reading your words as they trickle in. I love so many things. Too many to list here.
But. Something has happened. A curious lethargy. A sense of obligation, exhaustion. Once upon a time, I had a surplus of blog posts in my head at any given time ready to be born. Now? Now, I’m struggling a bit, spinning, grasping. Pretending. Pretending that the same enthusiasm is there, here, revving me on.
But it isn’t.
I have several theories. It could be a summer thing, a strangling sense of casualness and freedom that has taken hold. It could be a shift in creative focus; I am now mentally immersed in the fictional world of my next novel. It could be a deeper, existential issue though. I am feeling, more and more, a pull toward greater privacy, toward protecting details about my dreams and my days. It could be a more simple realization, slow-forming but here now, that every moment I spend here in this world, or thinking about this world, is one I do not spend in the physical world with my little girls and my man.
There are other things. Things I cannot tell you now. Things I might never tell you. Things that require, at least for now, vagueness and veiling. Things that I would like to write about, to release, but things I keep tucked tight to my chest out of prudence, purpose, paranoia.
The good thing? It seems I am not alone. In an emblematic moment of quasi-desperation, I just sent a little cry out into the Twittersphere. I said, “Need a blog post topic. Something fun & spicy. Ideas?” These words? Prime evidence that I am a bit lost, a bit empty, searching. I am glad I sent this message though. Because in no time, I got some responses including one from friend and fellow blogger Sarah of Momalom. She said, “I can’t seem to write about anything these days…sorry…no help. I think I’m done with blogging (for a while?).” Now I certainly hope Sarah isn’t done with blogging because I cherish her words and thoughts, but I must say it is encouraging to know that this blogging blahness is perhaps normal, something we all face from time to time.
The other good thing? This will pass. I know it. There will come a time – and it could be tomorrow – when my energy returns, when I am awash in ideas and inventions. I look forward to that time. Until then, I can only keep on, wading through the blahs that behold me, being honest with you. And with me.
All I ask? That you guys stick with me. Because I am going nowhere. I will be here. Weaving words. Being raw. Being real.
Being me.
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- If you blog, have you gone through similar periods of blah-ness? How have you weathered these periods?
- Have you experiences stints of blah-ness in your life in general?
- Do you think that admitting you feel blah is a first step in moving past this blah-ness?
- Do you blog or write in part to force yourself to be honest about what you are feeling?
- Are there things that you do not say on your blog, but want to? Why do you censor yourself? To protect yourself? Others?
Everyone struggles and...
I’m in the same spot. Uninspired. Treading water. Hoping someone throws me a life raft soon…Good luck.
Interesting that you should post this today of all days. I have been feeling the same exact thing. I have been absent from my blog in maybe a week. But I run on a strict No Obligation rule. Early on I decided that I would definitely NOT blog every single day. That is too draining. You are absolutely right, you have a life to lead outside this pseudo-world. And while you may have angst that you will lose followers (you will) you won’t lose the ones that mean the most, because they will wait for you. Actually, I have found that when I don’t post for a few days that is when I actually get a few new followers. Huh. Go figure. I only post when I have a need to share something. And although I do have plenty of ideas of inspiration and creativity to share with my followers, I don’t always have the time. And that is what really is holding me back. I think your questions are intriguing, particularly “admitting you feel blah is a first step in moving past this blah-ness”. Sometimes I agree with that. But I don’t think that you ever have to apologize for that. Everyone, everywhere has that. You are just writing about it from day to day. I think that in any endeavor, especially creative ones, you need to step back and see things from a different perspective, a refreshed point of view. Maybe that is what you are doing right now. Your words and ideas will rebound in no time. But until then, you have to take care of you. And I feel fortunate that my copy of Life After Yes is set to arrive shortly.
Enjoy the day, Miss Aidan!
Erin
P.S. My 30 Words today was going to be about this in a round about way as well. Great minds….;-)
Thanks for your honesty! I feel your pain. But I agree this too shall pass and one day we will all be filled with blog inspiration.
I hear you. All of it. But I think you already know that. After a certain amount of time in the blogosphere I think we all get to this point. How much do we share? What do we share? How much time do we spend?
Too many questions for me to answer at this point in my life. But it’s nice knowing that the time we put into for the first year or so has paid off…I mean, we have each other, right? We’ve established enough connections that we can’t totally fall off the blogging wagon.
xo
I’m right there with you, have been here for a while. And while I was hoping BlogHer would inspire a rebirth of sorts with blogging, it didn’t. I’m writing more, just not blogging it. Blogging… eh… I love so much, but…
Today my internet browser isn’t letting me comment on Blogger blogs. Which is a lot of the ones I read… so I’m taking that as a sign to back off from this space for the day. So I’m off
I so get what you’re saying. Thanks for putting it out there… xoxo
I have experienced this too. Probably not to the extent that you are now, but I have not been blogging as long. When blogging starts to feel obligatory I try to take a day off and let my mind rest and recharge. I usually find that this helps me find my energy and voice again.
I have read that most blogs have a lifespan of two years. I wonder why this is? Do we run out of things to say. Do we exhaust our need to say them? I’m not sure. I also want desperately not to fall into that predicatble category. But it makes little sense to continue something from which you gain less than you give. I have no idea how I’ll feel then. I have some time before I get there.
I, too, am trying to balance blogging and working on a book. I came right out and told my readers that this fall and winter, I’ll only be posting once a week. I follow several great writers who stick to a similar schedule. Something to consider!
I can SO identify with this! I have had other stresses, other creative projects, and other interests and I just can’t seem to recapture that spontaneity that I had going on earlier in the summer. Now I post and no one responds, no one laughs, everything seems serious and I think I am losing people. Meanwhile, I am still blogging about things that are meaningful to me I guess they are just more introspective. I feel enormous pressure to come up with something “funny”.
Here’s hoping lack of summer activities will inspire us all!
marsha
It was really good for me to read this, because I’ve been feeling the same way! But you can’t force inspiration to strike. I’ll stick around as well, hoping the passion and easy flowing ideas will return.
Just take your time. Take a break. You don’t need to post every day. Post when you have something to share. Post when you feel like it.
We’ll all still be here waiting for you to come back
Sometimes you have to take a step back from writing about life in order to commence living it fully. It happens. Sometimes experiences take your breath and your words- for days or months- and leave a vacuous silence where the bubbling stream once flowed. Learning to be comfortable with that uncertainty, learning to make friends with the silence and learning to let go… yields a bounty of wisdom and opens the corners of the mind.
The words will come when it is their time. For now, just BE. Be present, be now.
We’ll be here.
It seems that every bloggy friend I have is experiencing this very thing right now. I wondered aloud to a friend if maybe it has something to do with things that are invisible to us, the shifts of the seasons, the feeling of entering a period of hibernation. And maybe it’s just simply coming down from the summer rush rush fun fun relax rush rush fun fun…cycle? I don’t know. But you are not alone at all. I’m definitely feeling this very thing.
xo
I think we all understand this feeling. Give yourself a break. I think it is too much pressure to churn out a blog post everyday (although I admire your ability to do so). You are working on your novel, moving into a new space and embracing other issues. Shift your time and concentrate on what needs you the most and perhaps you will come back feeling refreshed and inspired.
I am right there with you. I have all these posts in my head but not the energy or the capacity to weave them into a post. I hope it will pass because I do enjoy the blogging community here. Or maybe it’s just a sign for me to start looking outward instead of inward for creative release.
As has happened before, it seems we’re both on the same wavelength Aidan! I hear you. It can be so difficult to stay excited, to keep this fun instead of a chore. We’re all muddling through this together.
Wow I was feeling like that a few weeks ago. I just didn’t even want to get on the computer. My two boys were at a rough stage and I just couldn’t come up with any good material. I felt like a zombie. I just took a step back. Didn’t go on the computer as much…focused on my boys and after a few weeks I felt better. I admit I am still struggling with this. I guess we all go through it?
I faithfully read every day and I think you do an amazing job with your blog. Yesterday’s post in particular was simply stunning. It’s been a while since I’ve commented and I owe you a nice, long email raving about your book…
I hope to be back on my own blog soon.
Yep, me, too. Really, for me, I think it’s the desperation of having no free time and a newborn who needs me, not to mention two older ones who are doing their best to understand my inattention. And I want to blog, need to blog, but with what time and what energy? And what scarce few memory-making opportunities get sacrificed when I do??
I rarely run out of steam for blogging. There are so many different things to write about that interest me. But I think that what really drives me more than anything to keep on blogging is the joy of reading about my children.
When I started my son was 3.5 and my daughter wasn’t born. I have a chronicle of their lives that I can turn to. When my daughter started kindergarten last year I made a point to read my thoughts about her brother’s first day of school.
If you don’t write/record some of the things that the kids do you forget about them. It is nice to look back and remember some of the silly/cute/fun things they used to do.
I came to realize this summer that I have a real life that’s pretty cool too. For a long time I was focusing so much on my blogging world that I kind of lost sight of that. I also realized that sometimes I have to let things go – I can’t read every post, I can’t comment on every post or every comment I get, etc.
For my own stagnation I keep a “blog journal” with one or two sentence ideas as they pop in my head. Some of them are too life-specific to be written about during any but the time periods when I get the idea (like Holidays, etc.) but others are more timeless and I can wheel them out whenever the well dries up. Not that I’m an expert or anything, because I have to say that I’m just as likely to blog once a week and banish my sitemeter from my view rather than struggle with creating a blog post!
I blog in spits and spurts. Sometimes I simply can`t justify the time spent away from other parts of my life and sometimes I just have nothing to say. Yep, I know what you mean.