On Pleasure & Booze
- 12
- 07
- 10
I recently stumbled upon a very interesting article in The Chronicle of Higher Education called The Case Against Health. I encourage you to click over and read it because I will not begin to do it justice here. But I did want to mention one point it makes, an interesting and no doubt provocative point. A point about pleasure. And booze.
For many people, a life without the oil of drink becomes too much to bear. A little wine eases the vague and subcutaneous unease that stress puts on our muscles; a martini induces a moment of forgetfulness when the anxieties and fears of the day recede. In pursuit of happiness, Americans are insistently encouraged to consume vast quantities of anti-anxiety drugs and antidepressants, but booze is never publicly celebrated. Rarely do we hear about the charms and benefits of alcohol, or the sociability it has promoted from the dawn of time, or the pleasure and consolation it has infused into the lives of billions over the course of human history.
- Richard Klein, The Case Against Health
As someone who readily admits to loving her Pinot Grigio (and misses it during her pregnancies!), I find myself nodding. Patently, alcohol is something that can be, and so often is, abused. I have witnessed such abuse in my own life. I’m sure most of us, if we really think about it, have.
But.
Yes, there is a but. And this particular but, per the article’s author, is rarely explored or exalted. But it seems that there are some undeniable benefits to alcohol (enjoyed appropriately). Why then is alcohol seemingly never celebrated, or talked about in a vaguely positive light? I know I am not the only one who sometimes relishes a fat glass of wine (or two) after a long and tricky day. I know I am not the only one who feels that a little celebratory sauce livens things up from time to time.
As long as we are dealing with those grays of moderation (what is moderation anyway?), why can’t we admit that booze – responsibly consumed (admittedly, some of us are not capable of responsible consumption) – has its place in so many of our lives, and sometimes brings us pleasure and happiness? Why as a culture have we grown so grimly obsessed with deprivation and “perfect health”?
**A snack-sized post for your consumptive delight. Quick. Easy. But no empty calories here. All the time I saved? Will be spent reading your words, so leave them in the comment box!**
__________________________________
Do you enjoy a cocktail (or several) from time to time? Does alcohol ever help you cope with life or better enjoy it? Why is it so shameful to admit that booze might play some role, however obscure, in our happiness? Do you think our society is increasingly obsessed with shunning bodily pleasures in the name of fallacious concepts of perfect health and perfect behavior?
** Join me this coming Thursday, December 9th from 8-11pm EST for my SheKnows book club discussion of LIFE AFTER YES (the final pick of the year!). Click here to join the book club (takes two minutes!) and then visit this link on Thursday evening to participate in the chat. I have no doubt it will be a fun few hours and I very much hope to see you there!**
Everyone struggles and...
Ok…so I thought I was the only one who liked to refer to her wine as pouring a big “fat” glass! ha!
You bring up an interesting point. Responsibly consumed a cocktail or glass of wine is one of life’s great pleasures, especially in the company of good friends and good conversation. And many health reports will say better to include some wine than no wine.
I think that as in most cases, the media distorts, all in the name of a headline. They like to focus on the wrongs and not the rights.
I think you are on to something… There is a tendency (on all of our parts, not just the media) to zero in on the wrongs. Note how much more people talk about the cracks in their relationships than they do the victories. Somehow, it is a better story if there is failure at the core, no? In this case though, I do think that it is really too bad that the focus tends to be exclusively on the abuses because I do think there are undeniable benefits to alcohol (and many other things) in moderation and when we do not acknowledge these benefits, we are missing something and also encouraging people to feel shameful and secretive about behaviors that are ultimately very normal.
No, no deprivation and pursuit perfect health, never works! You raised some good points here and I want to read the original article. As a nutritionist, I have written pro-coffee posts and articles, why have I left out my PM pleasure? Stay tuned. Celebratory Sauce, really love that term.
I think it is really amazing and powerful that you are a nutritionist who is willing to speak out against the utterly outrageous (and unworkable) concept of total deprivation. I eagerly await your pro-booze post!
Celebratory Sauce is a great term. I enjoy a glass of wine with a good meal, good conversation, or at a celebration. However, I don’t use it to de-stress because of a family history of alcoholism. I just don’t want to take that chance. But until now I had forgotten that an peditrician once recommended a glass of white wine before nursing in the evening.
Drinking without abusing is a good thing. I enjoy a drink at the end of the day. I had to smile because my husband has used the term “celebratory sauce”.
Heck, even the Bible touts the benefits of a little wine to enhance pleasure! (Most people choose to ignore those parts and instead focus on the warnings against over-indulgence, lol.)
I think the problem comes because people tend to blur the line between using alcohol to enrich our existing enjoyment, and finding our enjoyment solely in the booze. The latter, obviously, is not healthy, but the former … well, if we eat the occasional chocolate to help us enjoy our lives a bit more, why not the occasional glass of wine?
You make an important – and elusive – distinction between using alcohol and enjoying it. I do think the line is blurry here. Are we turning to wine to enhance our otherwise good lives or are we turning to it to escape day-to-day miseries? Rationale seems important here. An interesting question worth further consideration: Do we always know why we do certain things? What if we are unable to identify with clarity the reasons for our behaviors?
I think we are afraid to be labeled as weak. As needing that glass of wine or other alcohol to relax at the end of the day. The feeling of shame is especially prevalent in the church community, where drinking of any kind is greatly frowned upon. For those of us who are church goers, and still enjoy the occasional glass, it is sometimes an act of just keeping our mouth shut about what we choose to do in our free time.
I think you are right. I think there is such an emphasis in our culture on being strong and self-sufficient. The concept of needing anything is antithetical to being tough. This prompts a bigger question: Why are we so fearful of appearing weak from time to time? Aren’t we all mixtures of strength and weakness? Isn’t this what it means to be human?
“Why then is alcohol seemingly never celebrated?”
This reminds me of a conversation I was having with someone just the other day… Someone was asking me if there is less of a problem with alcoholism in the jewish community compared to America in general, and while I have no idea of the statistics of that, we got to the point that it is a cultural difference where alcohol is celebrated in a certain way within the jewish religion, therefore maybe kids grow up seeing it as something “normal” rather than forbidden. Each week for shabbat there are three blessings you’re supposed to say: one for the wine, one for the bread, and one for the light (candles). On other holidays, wine plays even more into our traditions.
I agree that it has a place, and it is something to be appreciated without our puritan-ish American shame complex. But maybe people don’t feel comfortable saying that so much anymore, in the same way there’s a slight but meaningful distinction between saying “I’d like a glass of wine” and “I need a glass of wine.” We’re very worried about even tiptoeing in the direction of abuse, it seems.
I love that you said you enjoy a “fat glass of wine”! I say the exact same thing! I think it is fine to enjoy a glass of wine or cocktail while out to dinner or even unwinding after a long hard day. It can become a problem if you find that you depend on alcohol to get you through your day.
I think one of the greatest problems is that there really aren’t public role models/examples of how to happily moderate. In the media, alcohol consumption is framed by beer commercials and frat party horror stories, making it look like anyone who drinks does so irresponsibly and to excess. And drunken celeb train wrecks always get lots of press. I suppose it’s because responsible consumption isn’t glamorous and doesn’t sell. All those negative examples make it hard to admit to finding happiness in a glass of wine without being seen as some kind of degenerate or moral failure.
One of hubby & my pastimes is actually home brewing wine and beer. It’s fun, a learning experience each time, and really exciting to sample the results. Since it can take months to get a batch complete, the enjoyment is a glass or two to feel good, and nothing more. We don’t want to waste all that hard work by drinking it all at once, but we find it’s often a nice, relaxing way to end the day!
We are indeed exposed to the terrible stories and train wrecks so much that it seems inadvisable sometimes to talk about enjoying alcohol for fear of being lumped with the various characters in these sad sagas. Maybe alcohol needs better PR! So fun that you brew your own beverages; I imagine that makes them taste even better!
I grew up in a conservative Indian household and drinking even one glass of any alcohol was considered taboo. My mom has never tried any type of alchol. Although I like an occasional glass of wine, some people suggest that alcohol is considered a “Rajasik” beverage and really contributes to a general restlessness for your body.
Imagine the French and Italians – sexy, passionate, beautiful people, often well into their sixties. They drink wine every friggin’ day, including for lunch and dinner. Then there’s all that buttery French food and Italian pasta.
I’ll take wine and lasagna over rice crackers and Vitamin Water any day!
I do think it is completely fascinating that in Europe drinking wine is celebrated and part and parcel of a lifestyle that is nothing to be ashamed of. I think that without the stigma, more people are able to not overthink this question and are able to indulge more organically without the concomitant shame that appears to be customary in our country.
As someone who has come to enjoy an occasional glass of wine only recently, I appreciate this. For years I was an accidental teetotaler. Labeled the good girl early on, I didn’t dare imbibe. But I’ve grown up (phew!) and it’s nice to be a grown up. And striving for perfect health necessitates tackling a very complex formula. Sometimes a glass of wine can bring me right back down to where I need to be: focused on the joys of my life, right before my very eyes.
Great article. I’m re-posting.
Sometimes history isn’t as far off as it feels.
We’re not that “far away” from Prohibition. My grandparents lived through it. There are still various religious groups that do not believe in drinking either.
My grandparents knew Civil War veterans and former slaves. It blows me away to think about that, but it is true. Stories and collective memories get passed down.
To Kat’s point, at the Passover seder we drink four cups of wine. Go to Shabbat services in many synagogues and you’ll find the “Kiddush club” and you can enjoy a drink.
Interesting points, Aidan. I think we get many mixed messages about alcohol, and as a result find it hard to have a healthy, moderate relationship with it. It seems similar to how we relate to food: we can be extreme and either overindulge or deprive ourselves.
Here’s to a good glass of vino and some relaxing moments!
Thank you for bringing up the parallel between food and alcohol because I think it is very instructive. I think one of the reasons so many of us have eating issues is that we think SO MUCH about food that our relationship with it becomes very strained and unnatural. Ditto with alcohol. I can only imagine that if we halted the over-analysis and listened to our bodies, fewer of us would have issues with food and alcohol. How to stop overthinking these things? I haven’t a clue.
I proudly admit I love my cocktails and I’m a wine snob. Of course, as with most wonderful things, moderation is key.
I love single malt scotch. Not a good girl’s drink. And in so many ways I look and act like Suzy Sunday. But I adore scotch. I breathe it in. I like it with just one ice cube please. I let it sit on my tongue and I take a deep inhale. Ahhh.
I adore pleasure. There is not enough pleasure in the world. The more pleasure, the less war. That’s just how it works.
It doesn’t have to be scotch. I’m equally transported by the color of my morning smoothie (though it’s different) and a gorgeous stone has been known to take my breath away.
I’m just a hedonist, I guess.
I like that you posted this, especially in light of how alcohol really is practically a character unto itself in your novel. And…not what I’d call all bubbles.
Thank you. I must say that it did take a considerable amount of courage to post this and I am not sure why exactly. Very likely it is because I have been indoctrinated with the same spiral of shameful thinking that all of us have and that I worried about declaring something about my affection for wine would be tantamount to confessing to a weakness of character on my part. And you are right about LAY. Alcohol was in so many ways an additional character in the story; and not an easy character either. I loved this comment and it reminds me just why I hit “publish” on this post.
A glass of red wine on a cold night, while lingering over dinner with your husband. An ice cold beer at a football game. A martini at happy hour, piano tinkling in the background. A glass of champagne, at lunch with your best friend after trying on wedding dresses.
What is so unhealthy about any of those things? You can be obsessive and excessive about anything, not just alcohol. Food, exercise, love, internet, gambling, shopping, coffee, work, video games, country music. Alcohol is just an easy thing to be excessive about.
And yes, you can absolutely enjoy an evening with your husband, a football game, trying on wedding dresses without alcohol. But a glass of pink champagne after trying on wedding dresses? A perfect, added touch.
I like Rebecca’s take. Pleasure is something that should be appreciated, celebrated.
I, for one, am about to enjoy a glass of red wine before bed. And maybe some chocolate too.
I like this post.
Amen.
You know how I feel about my wine, on the rocks, now and then. Often now.
I don’t share that grim obsession …
xoxo