A Big Girl Birthday
- 01
- 04
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(All photos taken and letter written on Toddler’s actual birthday – January 1, 2011. We were in South Carolina for some family fun.)
Dear Toddler,
Today you are four. No longer a toddler. A big girl indeed.
[I sit here both at a loss for words and swollen with them, full of things to say and paralyzed by the perceived enormity of this moment, this day. When you are older, you will better understand these pretentious, paradoxical musings. Enjoy the ignorance of youth, my babe.]
Last year, I wrote you a birthday letter. And in just one year you have changed so much. Today you are tall and wiry, your hair an impossible tumble of golden curls I can’t bear to cut. Today you wear glasses, funky metal frames that highlight your big blues, your studious silliness. I cannot imagine you without them. Today you have real passions. For animals and adventure, for people and purple, for drawing and dinosaurs. Moments ago, you skipped to me – in your yellow stegosaurus sweatshirt – a Christmas gift – that you’ve donned for the past three days – and you handed me a picture of a stegosaurus, detailed and delightful. Look, Mommy, Look what I made!
Today you are smart and sensitive, fierce and focused. A kind friend. A wonderful big sister. A darling daughter. You are generous and funny, full of confidence and curiosity, creativity and cool. You are so much fun and I am nothing but proud.
A few hours ago, you did something. I tucked you and your sister in your bedroom for afternoon naps so you could stay up late celebrating with your cousins. I flipped the light and blew kisses and then climbed into bed myself. I opened my book and read. Within minutes, I heard my favorite word in the form of a whisper.
Mommy.
It was you. I crept into your room. You were sitting on the edge of the bed and you told me you weren’t tired. I grabbed your little hand and pulled you with me. I lifted you and placed you on Daddy’s side of the bed. You settled in, your spine pressed against mine. And in minutes you were out. Sleeping. Sniffing. Sweet as can be. I studied you for a few minutes – your long lashes, your button nose, your full lips, your baby face. And then I went to sleep beside you.
This nap with Mommy? This doesn’t happen often. But it is as if you knew. You knew that I needed this, this dose of closeness, this commingling of limbs and blankets and breath, on this good and difficult day. Thank you, my big girl, for this birthday gift.
When you woke up, I whispered something in your ear. And you listened. I said, “I love you more than you know.” And you said something in return, something little. “Okay, Mommy.”
Because I do. I love you more than you know. On this New Year’s Day. On this birthday. On every single day.
Happy birthday to my gorgeous girl. I love you to pieces.
Mommy
Take a moment and wish my big girl a (belated) happy birthday! Are birthdays easy or hard for you? Are your kids’ birthdays easy are hard for you? Anyone think New Year’s Day is a pretty sweet birthday to have? Anyone agree that I might need to buy a second Stegosaurus sweatshirt in case this gets out of hand?












Happy birthday!
Sending you both lots of love.
xox
Happy Birthday! I spend a bunch of years lamenting that my kids were getting older and then had a client say to me “it just gets better and better” and it does. Though they are less little, with each year your relationship grows, there’s more to share and learn from each other. Having said this and knowing it’s all good, sometimes watching your children grow is emotional.
I think there is truth in this and I already see it. Of course I love the littleness bit and am eager to welcome our newest addition, but I am also truly amazed and awed by the people my kids are becoming. The evolution is tremendously valuable to witness. But watching them grow? Yes, emotional. To say the least.
Happy, happy birthday to your big girl! A darling and a delight, what gifts our children are to us.
Happy birthday to your big girl! I am so glad to have you back writing, I have missed reading your entries!
Thank you, Rachel! Truth be told, while my break was great, I really missed being here writing words and reading comments from my lovely readers. Needless to say, it’s wonderful to be back
Words can’t describe how much I adore that Toddler is wearing a yellow Stegosaurus sweatshirt. Along with the golden curls- gorgeous!
Happy 4th Birthday! I agree that New Year’s Day is an awesome day for a birthday.
The yellow sweatshirt and little girl curls are a winning combo, no?
And, yes, of all holidays, I think New Year’s Day is the best one for a birthday. She will always have the day off and plenty of festivities the night before
Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW 4 years Congratulations, may you look back on this year with fondness.
Always, Bumby
Happy Birthday, Toddler! Great sweatshirt.
Aidan – don’t just buy one replacement. Buy at least two!
Oh how sweet! I absolutely love the age of 4. I call it the age of independence. And those snuggles and naps, precious. I still steal them with my youngest who is 6 when hubby is out of town. Priceless!
Happy birthday little one.
Happy birthday to my favorite 4-year-old! Can’t wait to celebrate with the dinosaurs this weekend
Sad you guys and Baby Bulldog weren’t there to celebrate with us, but we are looking forward to the weekend. Love ya.
Hi Aiden,
Happy Birthday (because it is one for both of you in many ways!) I just wanted to tell you I finally read your book over the break and thought it was wonderful. The book was well written and thought provoking (not sounding too clicheed here.) There were so many themes that I could relate to in the book (though I am in a diffferent profession and a few years older.) Thanks for leaving me a copy. The other book I read over break was a memoir which, interestingly enough, explored similar ideas.
I hope this was a reasonable way to communicate with you.
Happy New Year,
Jane
Jane – So wonderful to see a comment here from you. And the birthday wishes mean a great deal since you are one of the only people who has known Toddler from day one
Hard to believe I will be visiting you with another newborn and soon! So thrilled and honored that you took the time to read LAY and that you so enjoyed it. I am curious to know what the memoir is!
See you soon! And Happy New Year!
She was a New Year’s baby? How cool! I am imagining all the fun ways she’ll be able to celebrate on her birthday when she’s older
Happy (belated) birthday to your big girl! And she’s a woman after my own heart – a pony-tailed, sensitive, stegosaurus lover born on my wedding anniversary.
Here’s to you and to her at the beginning of this exciting year for your family! xo
Happy Birthday. My oldest turned ten last week. I am still in shock. Time moves too quickly.
Happy Belated Birthday to your little girl! This moved me to tears. My one and only turns 5 this week. Oh, the time. How it passes. I wish it would stop sometimes.
Happy belated birthday!!!Four is a beautiful age and so are the many more to come!
Happy Birthday, Big Girl!!
For me, birthdays are easy – I don’t get too worked up over my own aging process.
But my kids? Just thinking about my oldest turning FIVE this spring is making my stomach knot up. I tease him all the time and say, “Stop all that growing!”
And he always answers the same: “Mom, you know I can’t stop. I’m going to just keep growing and growing until I’m as big as Daddy.”
If he only knew the internal turmoil those words bring: pride in his physical, mental and emotional growth; agony at the sheer speed of it all.
I love love love what your son says to you. And he is right. One day he will be as big as his Daddy. Hard to believe, isn’t it? The speed is not easy, but the evolution is exquisite and mind-boggling, isn’t it?
Wiping away tears….
Happy Birthday to your little lady!!! May you both have many more to celebrate!!!
I can’t wait to write letters to my child one day!
Happy birthday, big girl! January is a great month for birthdays coming from a Capricorn with a Capricorn son.
Love the pic of the girls hugging.
Birthdays? Love them as long as they’re not mine.
Cheers to Capricorns!! I love that picture too and even though this letter was an ode to Toddler, I felt compelled to include it because her role as big sister is such a wonderful component of her identity. Seeing the affection between my creatures, the spontaneous hugs and eruptions of infectious laughter, is something that I will never tire of. And I tend to agree about birthdays. I love them too, but am not as crazy about them when they are mine…
Happy birthday Toddler! I love this post. Birthdays are so hard, it is just a tangible milestone where you can’t avoid the passage of time. I nearly cried at my baby’s first birthday when we started singing, it was just too much. So bittersweet!
Happy Happy Birthday to your lovely girl. And welcome back.
I cried for an entire week leading up to my daughter’s first birthday. It’s still hard for me to accept and she’s almost 14 months.
I am all teared up. Happy Birthday to her!
Happy Birthday, little one!
This is such a beautiful letter, it actually brought tears to my eyes. We will celebrate our daughter’s first birthday in two months and this post has inspired me to write her a birthday letter each year. Thank you so much!
This is the sweetest letter ever. I can feel the love that you have for her just by reading these heartfelt and precious words. Isn’t it funny how our intense love for our children can leave us seemingly speechless? I remember when I attempted to write a birthday post for my son, at first I could do nothing but let the tears flow and marvel at how amazing he is.
Happy birthday to your little girl! And Happy New Year to your family!