I’ve said it before. And here I am saying it again: One of my very favorite elements of blogging is encountering new and interesting people and having new and interesting conversations. Enter self-proclaimed “writer, mom, graphic designer and lawyer’s wife” Angie of the wonderful, “honest and earnest site” All Adither. In her endearing bio, Angie states, “I am egregiously tall, have a son with severe food allergies and love cookies with beer. I alternately struggle with existential angst and the fit of my jeans.” Now, I am more of a cupcakes with Pinot Grigio girl myself, but I am thrilled that this egregiously tall and talented creature agreed to grace ILI and answer some of my questions. Thank you, Angie!

As a writer AND blogger, what do you think is the biggest different between writing prose and writing posts?

Angie: I think in writing posts you have to be more aware that another website is just a click away. People have less patience with internet content than with a magazine or book they’ve purchased or invested time to get from the library. It’s more crucial, I think, to grab the reader instantly. When I’m blogging, I try to write as if I’m talking to my friend.

That said, in my personal blog, I tend to let myself get artsy and play with turning phrases, etc. Though I generally try to keep my posts quite short and attach one of my photos that loosely relates to the content. It’s my place to experiment. On sites I’m hired to write for, as well as on my cooking site I’m much more strict with myself.

You’re married to an attorney. Several years ago, I stopped practicing law to become a full-time writer. It seems like the writer-attorney bond has many incarnations! How does the “lawyer’s wife” perspective affect your writing?

Angie: I don’t know if it’s being a lawyer’s wife per se, but being a wife in general has given me tons of material. The dynamic between a husband and wife, the richness, the tension, the arguments, the flirtation with longing, a little bit, for single life again all tremendously add to my writing.

Lawyers do tend to work long hours, so there’s that too. The resentment and sympathy toward your spouse who is, physically and emotionally away a lot of the time puts a certain spin on everything I write.

Love is something that comes up a lot here on Ivy League Insecurities and I noticed that you recently posted about celebrating your eighth wedding anniversary. What is one thing you wish you could tell every newlywed about making it to eight years (and beyond)?

Angie: When I look at my parents, who’ve been married forty-two years and my husband’s parents, who were married more than fifty years, eight doesn’t seem so lofty. And I fumble through it all just like everyone else. I guess I would say to choose your spouse wisely. Go for character over personality. And try to pick someone with a similar temperament. If you’re super social, don’t go for a hermit. You won’t be happy. Also, be open hearted. It’s so hard to live with someone, have kids with someone and handle daily stresses all while trying to compromise with another person, if you have compassion for your spouse, and a sense of humor, it’ll make it go more smoothly.

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Thank you, Angie, for your candid and thought-provoking answers! Cheers to the eternal struggle with jean fit and existential angst. Cheers to good blogs, good marriages, and honest words.

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Do you have a different set of standards when choosing blogs and books to read? Do you agree that a blog must grab the reader’s interest more instantly?

Do you agree that there is immense material inherent in the husband-wife relationship? (I do!) If married, do you experience the longing for single life to which Angie alludes? How do you cope with this longing, however minor it might be?

Do you agree with Angie’s counsel to go for character over personality when selecting a spouse. Do you agree that it is advisable to pick someone with a similar temperament?

Couldn’t ignore this one. Police recently responded to a domestic disturbance call in North Dakota and encountered an intoxicated woman who was breastfeeding her newborn. They arrested her. And she subsequently pleaded guilty to child neglect and faces up to five years in jail. For more of the sordid details on this boozing and boobing saga, click here.

No, I do not know enough about this situation to cast informed and well-calibrated judgment on the actions of the police here — and no one has compelling scientific evidence about the effects of alcohol in breastmilk on infants — but as a lawyer and as a mother and as an American, the story troubles me.

As a lawyer of latter day, I’m worried about the very real problem of line-drawing. Are we going to start rounding up pregnant women who are sipping wine or nibbling feta or not eating anything while pregnant because data indicates that these things might not be good for the fetus? Are we going to arrest a woman who has ingested vast amounts of caffeine and is nursing? Where do we draw these legal lines?

As a mother, I am concerned about this story because, well, (gasp), I consumed moderate amounts of wine while nursing both of my daughters. Yes, I was responsible. No, I didn’t nurse while intoxicated. But I would be lying if I said I abstained from Pinot during those postnatal months. I would also be lying if I said the Pinot wasn’t often a sublime treat at the end of a long and tiring day. And I am no scientist, but both of my girls appear to be thriving. (Brag Moment: Toddler’s teacher called her a superstar today!)

As an American, I worry about privacy. I am not sure anyone truly knows how to define privacy or that enigmatic right to privacy. But it’s easier to intuit when privacy has been violated. It seems to me that this woman’s right to privacy has been compromised in some way I cannot quite articulate. Admittedly, this is an argument I am less sure about. And this is when facts of the case matter. If this woman was conspicuously drunk, unable to care for her tiny baby, and someone in that home or nearby called the police because conditions were unsafe or out of hand, maybe her right to privacy has been surrendered? Who knows. My legal knowledge is rusty. This is where my lawyer friends can maybe help me out?

What are your thoughts on this arrest? Does it trouble you like it does me? Are you better able to articulate what is wrong with this picture? Or maybe there is nothing wrong with this picture and I am simply defending my own questionable behavior?