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The Husband Test

the husband test Last night, I had the distinct privilege of co-hosting a wonderful event with De Beers. It was Elle Magazine (who prominently features Life After Yes in this month's issue!) who played matchmaker and set me up to partner with the esteemed diamond company. The evening was absolutely amazing and indeed a sparkling success. I wish that I could tell you everything that happened last night, every stunning detail, but, alas, I will stick to the highlights to give you a taste of the delicious diamond-and-champagne soaked affair.

An intimate group of eighty or so women (many from the fabulous 85 Broads network of which I am part) and a sprinkling of men gathered in the Magic Room on the top of the LVMH Tower in Midtown. We sipped Dom Perignon and viewed an exceptional array of diamond jewelry. When the time came, I stood in front of the coiffed crowd and introduced myself, said a little bit about my book and the importance of diamonds to Quinn's story, and then I introduced a remarkable man.

Mr. Andrew Coxon. This gentleman has over four decades of experience in the diamond industry and is one of the world's leading experts in the field. He stood before us all and spilled fascinating secrets about the mystique and science of diamonds. The crowd was captivated by his charming British accent, his priceless anecdotes (carrying a $6 million diamond in his pants pocket through airport security), and his philosophical and practical insights into the world of diamonds.

Mr. Coxon's lecture was brilliant, but one thing in particular stood out to me. The idea of beauty. He spoke about how beauty so often transcends the 4Cs, certificates, ratings and other criteria, about how it is up to us to determine what is beautiful, how there is something profoundly subjective and instinctual about beauty. Mr. Coxon explained that when it comes to choosing a diamond (and a man? and a career?), it is all about the eye, mind, and heart.

After taking some questions from members of the rapt audience, Mr. Coxon invited us all to come up and check a machine he had on hand to test the beauty of diamonds. He explained that many perfectly-rated diamonds, when placed under this magnifying machine, are seen to be subtly or profoundly flawed.

How many of us went up there to do this Husband Test? Not many. I think we were all scared. Scared to know.

Hamida Belkadi, DeBeers' CEO, closed the evening with a few words of her own. She told the most wonderful story about meeting her husband. She was in town from France for the weekend visiting her sister. They were at a party in a garden. Hamida said that she spotted a man in the distance, on the far side of the crowd. And she said she knew. In that instant. That this was her man. And sure enough, he is. Hamida said that this is really how we should all choose our diamonds. That we should wait for that magical that's it feeling to overtake us.

I am well aware that I am rambling a bit here, that there is no ready focus to today's thread. But that's okay. That's life. Really, I just wanted to crack a window into last night's magic. To be honest, I'm in a bit of disbelief that I was invited to host such a lovely evening. But I am ever thankful that I was.

And today. I am smiling. In my mind dance images of dreamy diamonds. In my mind swirl questions about instinct and love and beauty and brilliance.

Thank you, Elle Magazine, 85 Broads, Hamida, Andrew, and DeBeers for including me in such an exquisite evening. I am honored and humbled beyond measure.


  • Do you agree that there is something enigmatic about beauty that transcends objective criteria?
  • Do you believe in love at first sight (when it comes to people and things)?
  • Would you have taken the Husband Test or would you prefer not to know about the true nature of your stone?

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