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Welcome to my little corner of the ether. This is where you will find information about my books and musings on life and love in New York City. To stay in the loop about all things ADR...

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Two years ago, I woke up as a published author. My novel LIFE AFTER YES was officially out in the world. The day was surreal, and I remember it keenly. It was rainy. I had lunch with Mom and Husband. At that lunch, I had a glass or two of wine. To celebrate. To calm.

I remember feeling kind of dizzy, and scared. Excited too, of course. I remember not knowing what to do with myself. I remember walking into my Barnes & Noble and finding my book and telling the clerk guy that I wrote it. I remember smiling when he asked me to sign a few copies. I remember how my hand shook as I took my Sharpie to those pages.

I remember feeling alive and invincible. I remember expecting big things. I remember feeling the adrenaline, the anxiety, the anticipation. Anticipation of what? Bestseller-dom? Life-changing success? Standard-issue praise? I don't really know.

Well, it's been two years. And this makes complete sense and none at all. Wasn't I just debating Books for Bulldogs? Wasn't I just in the dressing room of Barney's trying on that fabulous book jacket for my fabulous book reading? Wasn't I just flitting about the library of the Hudson Hotel in that little black dress and orange earrings signing copies of my book, my book(!)?

A lot has happened in two years. Almost immediately after my publication date, I began pondering Baby #3. And pondering quickly gave way to pregnant. And this changed everything. It did. Not in a bad way, but a real way. I felt sick and sluggish as I tend to do during the first trimester and my professional ambition started to subside. Sooner or later, I stopped checking my Amazon ranking (indeed a blessing) and settled into what was a slower pace at home. I continued to blog here, and to roll around in my fiction, but my genuine focus was on my 2.5 girls.

And then she came. My littlest babe. And I loved her the moment I saw her and even wrote something, one of my very favorite somethings, from my hospital bed. And now she is one. Running around, collecting words, stories, being a sister.

Two years. And through it all - the ups and downs, the exquisite and the impossible, the wine and the worries - I have written. Words. Words that meant something, words that mean everything, words I will one day go back and read. Because they are clues, these words. Clues of where I have been, and who I have been.

Two weeks. In two weeks, I will do something big. I will meet my lovely agent for breakfast. And we will catch up - about life, literature, and little girls - and then I will do it. I will reach into my bag and pull them out - more than three hundred pages of a story I have written. My next book. My next baby.

Happy two years, LAY!! I love you, kid. And you will have a little sister soon, I hope! :)

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Where were you two years ago? Do you find it hard to juggle different parts of your life, your self? In your comment, let me know if you would like a copy of LAY and I will send one along!

I Want Another Baby

As Long As She Lets Me