When I blog, I think about my girls. I think about them because I am writing about them, or because I am considering what effect my words might have on them. Now and in the future. It is very important to me that this blog is about me, my life, my questions and not really about them. My aim is to tell stories about them that are small and true and innocuous, stories that capture what it is to be an imperfect, but impassioned mother in this world.
But. Yes, there is a but. My girls are small now. But they are growing fast. Too fast. One day, they will understand better what I am up to. They will know that I am not just fiddling around on the computer, but that I am writing, and sometimes about them. They will notice the images of their backsides, and will say, Hey, that's me. And maybe they will ask why.
And I will tell them that I am a writer. And that I like to tell stories, real and imagined. And I will explain that my very favorite real stories have to do with them, the joys and challenges they bring me. And maybe they will like this. Maybe they will understand it. Maybe they will not care.
Or maybe they won't approve. Maybe they will ask me to stop. Stop posting pictures of them even though they are technically anonymous. Maybe they will ask me to stop. Stop writing words about their days and their ways. Maybe they will be uncomfortable with the fact that any portion of their lives, and our life together, is out there. Out here.
What will I do if this happens? If the creatures I love most in this world ask me to cease doing something that means a great deal to me? Will I honor their request and stop? Or will I keep writing and alter the content of my creations to include less about them? Or will I tell them that this is life, my life, that I must write about it, and that means them.
This is tricky, no? Just thinking ahead and aloud...
How often do you think about the effects of what you do on your kids? If your kids asked you to stop writing about them, would you? To what extent should we tailor our lives and our professions to please and protect our little ones?