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20130923-103132.jpgOn Saturday, we hosted a going-away party for Sister T. She moved to San Francisco. Yesterday. Sob.

It was a good party. Fun. Festive. Full of young and smart 25-year-olds. It was cool to glimpse who I was a decade ago. But it was also somewhat unsettling to realize, and feel how much I've changed.

Ten years ago, I wasn't married. I didn't have kids. I was still at the law firm, still lost. I was still drinking. Drinking a lot. Partying hard. Soaking up life.

But Saturday night was a different story. I was in my little cocktail dress with my precious Mad Men-esque flip hair. I sipped water all night, nibbled raw veggies, slipped in and out of polite conversation. When it got late, when the crowd grew appropriately rowdy, when everyone began to have fun, I changed into flats. And then I diplomatically (I hope) kicked the youngsters out of my house so I could get some sleep and wake up to write the next morning. Which I didn't even do.

I almost don't recognize myself. Is this new, square version of ADR a product of not drinking or maybe just a product of time, of maturity, of evolution? I don't know.

Do I miss my silly, wine-soaked twenty something days? Sure, a bit. But the thing is, the crazy thing is, that I like the way things are now. A little quieter, a little less spirited, but wonderful still.

And there's still plenty of silly left in this almost 35-year-old (eek!) Witness the ridiculous selfie above. See, it's not all gone.

How have you changed in the last 10 years? Are you more square? Do you miss your younger self, your younger life?

A Happier Hour with J. Courtney Sullivan

On Miscarriage & Hope